At last, the book that answers the question on every parent’s mind: Why does my toddler hate me? Okay, it’s not really hate. It’s just that a little psychopath who walks through life 100% convinced that he or she is the center of the universe does not care that you have a heart, a mind, or a soul. You are simply a skin-covered robot tall enough to reach the candy on top of the fridge. And clean up the rage-vomit when you make the fatal mistake of cutting off the crust on your toddler’s toast. (Or not cutting it off—seriously, you can’t win.) Includes: The theory of toddler evolution Mealtime (AKA Hell) Your unraveling life And how not to die inside

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Author by Bunmi Laditan
Genre Humor
Publisher by Workman Publishing
File Read 176
ISBN-10 9780761185758
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Following the success of Go the F**k to Sleep, Confessions of a Scary Mommy, and Ketchup Is a Vegetable, a collection of funny, warm, and charmingly profane tales from the frontlines of parenthood by the author of the popular Baby Sideburns blog. Once upon a time you and your partner had a perfect life: dinners out, weekend mornings cuddling in bed, brunch with friends. Then you gave birth to a poop machine (or two). Now, it's all about the pediatrician, breast pumps, princess dresses, and minivans. And discovering that your pride and joy is actually a little A-hole. When your son wakes you up at 3:00 A.M. because he wants to watch Caillou, he's an a-hole. When your daughter outlines every corner of your living room with a purple crayon, she's an a-hole. When your rug rats purposely paint the kitchen ceiling with their smoothies, they're a-holes. At times like these, it's only natural to want to kill them (or yourself). But it's against the law (and there's the suicide hotline). Plus, there's that whole loving them more than anything in the whole world thing. In I Heart My Little A-Holes, Karen Alpert shares hilarious stories, lists, and deep thoughts on the joys and horrors of raising children. Accompanied by cheery illustrations and photos I Heart My Little A-Holes will make you laugh so hard you'll wish you were wearing a diaper.

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Author by Karen Alpert
Genre Humor
Publisher by Harper Collins
File Read 304
ISBN-10 9780062341617
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Once upon a time Sarah Fader wrote a blog post called 3-Year-Olds Are Assholes. It went viral on HuffPost Parents with over 400,000 shares on Facebook. This book tells the story of three-year-old Samantha, who is determined to make a rainbow. It features illustrations by Shari Ryan.

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Author by Sarah Fader
Genre
Publisher by Osiris Ink
File Read 54
ISBN-10 1941065171
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A glimpse into the tribulations of parenting that is part documentary, part therapy, and completely hilarious. It all started when busy father Greg Pembroke posted a few pictures online of his three-year-old son, mid-tantrum, alongside the reason his son was crying: He had broken his bit of cheese in half. In Reasons My Kid is Crying, Greg collects together photos sent from parents around the world, documenting the many, completely logical reasons why small children cry. Among them: “I let him play on the grass” . . . “He ran out of toys to throw into his pool” . . . “The neighbor’s dog isn’t outside”. The result is both an affectionate portrait of the universal, baffling logic of toddlers—and a reminder for burned-out parents everywhere that they are not alone.

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Author by Greg Pembroke
Genre Humor
Publisher by Three Rivers Press
File Read 208
ISBN-10 9780804139847
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As seen on Good Morning America, the irreverent, bracingly honest, and “awfully funny” (The Boston Globe) satirical parenting guide from the Internet’s most infamous tot, whose unchecked sense of entitlement and undeniable charm have captivated hundreds of thousands of fans. Are you the confused parent of a toddler? Are you constantly disappointing the 2T in your life? Are you tired, stressed out, and looking for relief? I can’t help you with that last one, but if you want to become an A+ servant to your small child, this book is for you. Who better to teach you about toddlers than another toddler? In this book you’ll learn: • How time-outs make you look like a fool • Why potty training is not only unnecessary but unrealistic for children under eighteen • Why toddler beds are OUT and letting your child sleep on the diagonal in your bed is IN • The best way to apologize to your toddler for all of those Pinterest casseroles • That when you love someone, you accept them as they are, pants or no pants The hard-hitting knowledge in The Honest Toddler will save you thousands of dollars in unnecessary whole grains and toothbrushes. Happy reading. You’re doing the right thing. For once.

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Author by Bunmi Laditan
Genre Humor
Publisher by Simon and Schuster
File Read 256
ISBN-10 9781476733722
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A hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice. "Get this for your pregnant friends, or yourself." --People Recommended by Nicole Cliffe in Slate Featured in People Picks A Red Tricycle Best Baby and Toddler Parenting Book of the year One of Mother magazine's favorite parenting books of the year How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids tackles the last taboo subject of parenthood: the startling, white-hot fury that new (and not-so-new) mothers often have for their mates. After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper? Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child. Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today. On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate--and rebuild--your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children. Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.

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Author by Jancee Dunn
Genre Family & Relationships
Publisher by Little, Brown
File Read 288
ISBN-10 9780316267113
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Now that I’m a mom, I know the most painful part isn’t getting something giant through your hooha. It’s having a real live child. If you are the kind of mom who shapes your kiddo’s organic quinoa into reproductions of the Mona Lisa, do not read this book. If you stayed up past midnight to create posters for your PTO presidential campaign, do not read this book. If you look down your nose at parents who have Domino’s pizza on speed dial, do not read this book. But if you are the kind of parent who accidentally goes ballistic on your rugrats every morning because they won’t put their shoes on and then you feel super guilty about it all day so you take them to McDonald’s for a special treat but really it’s because you opened up your freezer and panicked because you forgot to buy more frozen pizzas, then absolutely read this book. I Want My Epidural Back is a celebration of mediocre parents and how awesome they are and how their kids love them just as much as children with perfect parents. Karen Alpert’s honest but hilarious observations, stories, quips and pictures will have you nodding your head and peeing in your pants. Or on the toilet if you’re smart and read it there.

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Author by Karen Alpert
Genre Humor
Publisher by HarperCollins
File Read 320
ISBN-10 9780062427090
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The moment the second line on the pee stick turns pink, women discover they've entered a world of parenting experts. Friends, family, colleagues, the UPS delivery guy -- suddenly everybody is a trove of advice, much of it contradictory and confusing. With dire warnings of what will happen if baby is fed on demand and even direr warnings of what will happen if he isn't, not to mention hordes of militant "lactivists," cosleeping advocates, and books on what to worry about next, modern parenthood can seem like a minefield. In busy Mom-friendly short essays, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay delivers the empathetic straight dirt on parenting, tackling everything from Mommy & Me classes ("Your baby doesn't need to be making friends at three months old -- you do! But not with people you'll meet at Mommy & Me") to attachment parenting ("If you're holding your baby 24/7, that's not a baby, that's a tumor"). Stefanie Wilder-Taylor combines practical tips with sidesplitting humor and refreshing honesty, assuring women that they can be good mothers and responsibly make their own choices. A witty and welcome antidote to trendy parenting texts and scarifying case studies, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay provides genuine support, encouragement, and indispensable common-sense advice.

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Author by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
Genre Family & Relationships
Publisher by Simon and Schuster
File Read 240
ISBN-10 1416940839
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The beloved and respected TV disciplinarian and star of the new TLC show "Family SOS with Jo Frost" outlines the five tenets of "disciplined parenting," which are the limits and routines parents need to have in place around sleep, food, play dates, early learning and manners. Original. 35,000 first printing.

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Author by Jo Frost
Genre Education
Publisher by Ballantine Books
File Read 300
ISBN-10 9780345542380
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The author offers her witty, acerbic observation on life in suburban America, taking on topics like marriage, motherhood, and neighborhood politics.

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Author by Jen Mann
Genre Biography & Autobiography
Publisher by Ballantine Books
File Read 208
ISBN-10 9780345549839
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